Book Blogger Suffering Mental Illness From Reading Catch-22?

Dateline: Bibliophilopolis, January 23, 2012
A local book blogger was found incoherent & disoriented in his home Sunday evening. Apparently, some fellow bloggers had become concerned when his blog had fallen silent for an even greater period of time than usual. Investigation revealed that he had been reading Joseph Heller’s novel, Catch-22, in an “assignment” from the Kurt Vonnegut Memorial Library’s book club. Attempts to contact other members of the club for reaction are ongoing.

Apparently, the stricken blogger has been showing up every thursday at the club so far this month, thinking the meeting was scheduled. When told last week by library volunteers that the club meets the LAST Thursday of the month, he reportedly replied, “This IS the last Thursday!” He was then notified that the meeting is on January 26th which prompted the protest, “But that’s the NEXT Thursday of the month!” before storming off muttering to himself.

The blogger’s chief complaint seems to be that he imagines the book is getting longer and longer the more he reads. Just as the number of missions The unfortunate Yossarian is required to complete is continually raised in the book, the blogger claims whenever he thinks he’s nearing the end of the book, he sees there are more pages than the last time he looked. Clearly hallucinating, as even he acknowledged, he remained hopeful that in a sustained, marathon reading session he still might be able to finish by Thursday.

Asked just when he might be able to get a marathon reading session in, he would only say, “When I have more free time!” The same reporter inquired when that might be and was told, “Well, not until I finish this damn book, that’s for sure!”

Library officials have been attempting to contact other members of the book club in fear of the possibility that this phenomenon may be widespread. Ominously, only a few have responded, and in somewhat cryptic emails, perhaps confirming their worst fears. Whatever happens, this Thursday’s meeting should prove interesting – if anyone shows up…